Mark and I had a little confrontation last Sunday Morning.
No, not a fight. Just a lil confrontation, which we think is healthy for every relationship.
I've been very sketchy these past few weeks; pushy towards him to do this and do that. Been very inconsiderate with his situations and opinions.
He told me I am selfish. Yeah. HE SAID THAT IN MY FACE; and i was flabbergasted.I didn't retaliate cause i know he's right. He spoke of many things like about how silly i am, how manipulative i am, how imperfect i am. I hold off my tears, but inside me, I was breaking; like literally breaking! I wanted to say a word or two to somehow explain my side; but something's shutting off my mouth.
Listening to his lament made me realize i was such a brat. I said sorry and told him, probably I am not ready for a lifetime commitment yet. But he turned to me and said "amidst everything, i still want to marry you next year."
I don't know where he's getting that love. i dont have any idea where he's getting that supply of patience and kindness he has for me. All i know is that i am so blessed to have this kind of man who loves me amidst my flaws and imperfections.
As a response, i asked God to change the things i need to change in my me so that i can give Mark what he deserves from me. I know i still have a very long way to go, but i just need to be patient on this process.
All these time i thought he's blessed because I am his girlfriend; but now i realized, i am more blessed because i am in a relationship with one of the most wonderful men Heaven has ever designed; and that this guy is willing to grow old with me and is willing to experience the grey hair and wrinkled-skin days with me! i wonder how our family would look like and how we're gonna spend those days together.
I am so much blessed and loved.
Oh please 2013. please come soon!
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